Success Redefined

Posted on March 20, 2013 by krisgetshealthy

How do you measure something that there is no clear definition of? Something that is not actually quantified by everyone the same way? How can one person simply define a word and it be the pinnacle and definitive answer for everyone. Simple, you can’t, I can’t.
Each and every single one of us must sit back and look at the big picture and look to see what we are trying to find success at. Are you successful can be such a loaded question, and lead down so many roads. It can lead you to a very positive or very negative place based upon where you are mentally and how you interpret the question.
In the health and wellness world how do you view success? When I started losing weight I was over 400 pounds. I know you have read it over and over again but it bears repeating because I will never forget it, I felt as though I was going to die. I was trapped inside a tomb that was my body. I had high blood pressure, dangerously high, I had high cholesterol, horrendous triglycerides and the thought of doing anything except driving around delivering packages in my car, and drinking red bull and Starbucks at all hours of the day and night was my reality.
I am still not at my goal weight, I got to about 250 and my life went through a shift. My personal life underwent an overhaul, my professional life went through a complete shift where I went from working nights and weekends to a 55+ hour a week shift that starts at about 3:45 every weekday morning. I regained in the neighborhood of 50 pounds and if I didn’t know better by most of the definitions that I can think of that would make me a failure.
WRONG! I make my own definitions of success, and I do not view this as a failure, because I am still trying. I am still actively choosing to pick the better choices for food. I choose to go to the gym instead of going to the coffee shop on Saturday mornings. I choose to push myself to be better I choose to get up and go.
I measure success not in the number on the scale, because a number while a unit of measure is not a measure of self worth, and is not a measure of what I have accomplished but in how I feel. I do not measure success in the size of my jeans, or in the number of friends I have or the number of miles I can run, which by the way is ZERO. I measure my success on the number of times I get up when I fall down.
I measure my success on how strong I can be, for myself and for my friends. I measure success in what I can give to others, and the strength I can share. This past weekend I participated in the #happy5k project. (Check them out on Facebook and Twitter!) I love this idea, it is a virtual 5k, and their motto is Have a Purpose, Push Yourself. I love this motto. As most of you know I am currently stuck in the pool for exercise (and if you followed twitter last nights dreadmill went horribly and I am back in the water until further notice) So I water walked my 5k.
I love that there are things like virtual 5k’s that I can participate in that allow me to have the sense of community with other athletes, that can give me the same rush and feeling of success that I had when I did the Prior Fat Pack 5k, or the Fathers Day 5k. I am hopeful that I will be back in action by the time the Color Run comes around in July, but since the treadmill killed me after 1.25 miles yesterday and I can barely walk due to heel issues from it today we shall play by ear.
I had a successful virtual 5k, I am part of something bigger. I love it!
So I will continue on babysteppin-waterwalkin my way thru one setback at a time as long as it takes.
I am a success story, I will forever be my own success story, I just have to decide how I want to end my success story… luckily there is still too much of the story to be written to worry about an ending.
Are you successful? Do you keep pushing yourself despite the odds to get where you want to be? How do you define your personal success?

#c25k Cult

Posted on November 2, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

So for those that have followed my blog for a while you remember the launch of the pack, we tag on twitter as #f2fpack now, back in the day we were the #priorfatpack. We did a 5k together back on Memorial Day… it was a long time ago.

Prior to memorial day I had started to train with a #c25k app on my iPod to get ready for the 5k run. I pushed so hard to try to get ready for that run and my body just wasn’t having any parts of it. I went back to training again after that 5k and pushed for the Fathers Day 5k… and again my body rejected my advances. Every time I pushed to try to move past week 3 my body was shutting down.

On this journey I have learned many things. One of which is I don’t quit things anymore. So once again I started pushing myself through the #c25k starting again with week 3. Guess what? I have been making progress! Not only have I made it through week 3, I passed through week 4 and I am working the week 5 program right now! Thursday morning will be my first “no walk” day. 20 minutes are on tap. It would be a lie if I said I am not scared of that run. I mean, the though of twenty minutes of running is terrifying! I guess I just need to make sure I have some good music loaded up and that I don’t watch the clock. I think that has been the biggest positive thing lately, not watching the clock as I run my intervals. That and remembering to puff on my albuterol before I go to the gym, without that stuff I am in trouble.

I hadn’t really looked ahead in the #c25k program to see what was coming up so finding out I had a 20 minute run this week came as a bit of a shock! Up until now most of the weeks had been the same intervals over and over again… for well weeks at a time… I redid week three so many times… SO MANY times. There is nothing wrong with repeating weeks is what I am told. There is no set rules for how this works.

At this point I have given myself over to the program. It almost feels a bit like a cult. I don’t ask why things are the way they are, I accept the program the way it is. I know that there are reasons why I have a 20 minute run Thursday and then Sunday’s run will be intervals again. Why ask why? When I tweeted about the run and mildly questioning the run I did hear that many training programs have longer workouts one day and then it backs off the next. I also was told that this is the turning point of the program… this is where you find out that you can run. Well I figured that out last week when I ran my mile!

I have an upcoming 5k on the books, it isn’t the big Thanksgiving 5k through downtown Minneapolis I am planning to do the Charities Challenge Thanksgiving Day Giving Thanks 5k. I really am torn because I want to do both races. I really would love to spend the morning with my friends downtown because I have never done a race there, however I know there are like 10,000 people signed up for that race and we won’t be sticking together, and I wouldn’t want to. I never want to hold anyone back. The CC group is just amazing, they celebrate everyone crossing the finish line because it is a goal just to finish for some of us. I am so thankful for them this year so it is only appropriate that I spend Thanksgiving with them.

I will likely join CC for the Christmas and New Year run’s as well. Nothing set in stone, finances will be a determining factor as will the weather and my overall health by then. I am excited to be moving forward with my jogging though. I am happy to be an actual athlete, or stating to feel like one. Slowly, one step at a time I am changeing, creating my new self from the lump of clay I was given.

Riding the High

Posted on October 28, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

So Thursday was AMAZING! I think it was quite possibly one of the proudest moments of my entire life! I talked to my parents and told them about my accomplishment because you know what… I got bragging rights from that run! My dad had always struggled with his weight, he was heavy as a kid, and for a bit of his early adult life. He was SO PROUD of me. He has become a great cheerleader for me during this weightloss and healthiness journey. When I was young there was a lot of picking on me due to my weight problems and I know he didn’t realize just how bad it hurt me. Our relationship is being repaired. He told me that he has never in his entire life been able to run a mile.

Dad was always, in my opinion, the more fit of my parents growing up. Yes he struggled with his weight, he had been near 200 pounds for as long as I can remember, but he did things like go hunting in the mountains. That meant he had to “be in shape”. Not in that “round is a shape” way. We had a treadmill, he used it. He had a gym membership, and he used it. Mom exercised too, she would swim laps while she went to night school, but I never really thought of her as active. Her job keep and kept her sedentary. So when I told them both about my accomplishment I really felt amazing when they both told me that they had never in their lives run a mile.

I felt like an athlete. I woke up wanting to go back and run again, but I resisted the urge because I know I need to hold off and wait to see how my body responds. It is sometimes so difficult for me to walk the line. I want so much to push my body, push it until it breaks and I vomit in the gym like you see, or don’t see on The Biggest Loser. I know that because of things like my fibromyalgia, and my ehlers-danlos I need to respect my body even more than normal. I know watching friends recover from injuries and how long it takes healthy active normal people to recover that an injury to me could be a potential disaster! So I strive to create balance.

So Friday begins my crazy work schedule and my next formal workout won’t be until Sunday… when I head back to the gym for another #c25k run. I am excited to try week 5. I wont lie, there is a part of me even now that is still scared to try week 5, even though I just did this amazing thing the thought of those intervals and the potential to not do it scares me.

I will be squeezing in two sessions of Just Dance or Just Dance 2 in on the Wii during Friday and Saturday as workouts since my gym isn’t available 24/7. I also need to make a shopping list and pick meals for the next week. I am setting myself up for success any way I can. #NoExcuses That mile reminded me that I really am making progress, even if I can’t see it all the time.

Have you done any amazing things lately? Surprised yourself? Got any suggestions for my dinners this week? Let me hear it!

Today I am a Runner

Posted on October 27, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

Yes, just last night I sat at a table with Jen, a priorfatgirl and said I was not a runner. Today my tune has changed. No I have not yet completed c25k. I did clear a hurdle which I never completed before though. I finished week 4! I did all three days of it!!! Freakin AMAZEBALLS!!!! I mean, let’s be honest here for a moment, holy flippin cow!

As I drove to the gym this morning I was nervous. I didn’t have nervous tummy or anything but the nerves of my impending run were starting to weigh on my mind. I told myself I had done this run twice before and it was no big deal. I was sadly the FOURTH person checked in at the gym this morning. Such a slacker. I signed up for my machine and away I went.

As I got to my last interval I reached for my dumbphone… as in not smart phone I sent the saved text that it was my last interval for the set and I knew I was almost done. I ran my little heart out thinking about how proud my family would be of how far I have come. I thought about people in my lives who had passed away… sadly there has been a lot of death around my friends and I lately. Perhaps it is the time of year, but as the woman on my app said One minute remaining I grinned knowing “I got this!”

The “cooldown” kicked in with the app, which I don’t generally do because I have more working out to do, and I looked out into the darkness of the morning to see rain falling from the sky dancing in the lights of the parking lot. It felt like those raindrops were full of emotion for me. A release, a gift from above to remind me to keep going. After about 90 seconds of walk… I hit the 1.5 mile mark on the treadmill and I did the self inventory and at that moment I knew it was time.

I sped the treadmill back up to my “run” speed. Now with my short little legs my maintainable run speed is 3.6. I can sprint at 4.2, but running is 3.6… so I keyed 3.6 and hit enter…. and away I went. #c25k counted down and finished itself off and I figured it grooving to my tunes, feeling the rhythm in my body and I ran.

I let my feet pound of the deck of the treadmill planning only to run until I was tired of running or my body was ready to give up. Then it happened… that thing… that only seems to happen to other people. I didn’t stop running at .1 or .25 when .5 came around the emotions started welling up inside of me. (in fact I am getting a little emotional right now!) My body was ready to be pushed, ready for a challenge. I kept running and I ran the entire mile. That is right… I RAN A MILE!!! Today I became that person.

As I neared that last tenth of a mile I have to admit I started to get scared, mostly because I was doing it. I wasn’t too tired, I felt like I could do more. I wanted to push myself farther. However I am bad about knowing my limits at times and I don’t want to overdo it. I also was feeling fearful that once I stopped I would never be able to do it again. What if this was a fluke? What if I can never run again?

I left the gym and wanted to call and text everyone I know! I wanted to text Ann and tell her right away because she has really been behind my running since before I did my first 5k but I didn’t want to wake her up… but this morning really changed something inside me. I can feel it.

Today I became a runner.

Guess Who’s Back

Posted on October 12, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

At 5:30 this morning my alarm beeped at me, it wasn’t a wake up alarm like most normal people. It is my are you at the gym or on your way alarm. My evening reminder that I need to move my body.
Since getting the news from the cardiologist that I am cleared to resume activity on Monday… I had yet to test my limits. I knew Wednesday would be the day. Usually I get to the YWCA about 6:15 on Wednesday for water aerobics… Not this time.
The excuses are gone. My heart is strong and it has reinforced my mind. I know now what needs to be done. I know what I want and how far I am willing to go to attain my goals.
Shortly after 5:30 my membership card was scanned at the front desk and with my Polar Heart Rate Monitor on I climbed the stairs to the cardio area. Today would not be an elliptical day. Oh no, the eyes are back on my desire to run. My body wants to be like everyone else. Diseases and difficulties be damned, I am pushing for it again.
I picked my favorite treadmill, located in the weights section infront of the windows and started Week3 again.
I ran. I did my intervals like a champ! When the 28 minutes were up I wadn’t ready to stop. My obsessive nature pushed me… I dug in and rooted out and found myself finishing out 2 miles in just under 38 minutes. While I am not breaking any records I did it and I was proud.
I then headed to my class and started to feel like the old me. I miss my long workouts. The feeling like I accomplished something great, something amazing. When people would find out how much time I spent in the gym they would always be surprised. I enjoyed that surprise. It made me feel like less of a fraud at the gym, like more of an athlete. Endurance… the ability for my body to match the sheer will of my mind. I need that, it keeps me strong, it keeps me going.
So I am restarting c25k. I may end up on Week3 for six months but I am not giving up! Balancing that training with the elliptical, water aerobics, and hopefully some Zumba I will be all set for my next adventure.
Eyes on the Prize! I am back! RAWR!!!

Gym Talk

Posted on August 17, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

So all this new working out twice a day, changing my routine stuff has left me neglecting blog world. Splitting my workouts up has been, overall good for me I think. While I feel as though it is taking up a larger portion of my day, because I am in the gym TWICE, not just for one chunk, I find that I feel less pressured while I am there.

There had been times when I would go for my “marathon” cardio sessions, which could at their peak last up to three hours, and would grow so bored, and literally would feel the hate building for the boredom of the gym. Knowing now that I have an end point preset every time I step onto what ever machine I get onto has me focused, giving it my all.

In giving it my all, I find I am still struggling with my target heart rate. Well duh Kris, you have only been working on it for what, a week? Holding myself back from going “balls to the wall” during a workout is super difficult. I am looking into HIIT training more. I think C25k may make a regular reappearance in my training, perhaps I will use the elliptical for it, just to push myself a bit.

I have a tentative schedule for my workouts right now, and it seems to be working. I don’t want to lose focus though. Mondays and Wednesday mornings and Tuesday nights are, at present scheduled for water aerobics class that is about 55 mins long. I have these blocked out in my schedule. I really enjoy being in the water and these classes are the ones that provide me with a little more of a challenge, or something different that the land workouts I currently do don’t provide me. Outside of that I have “45-55 minutes of cardio” scheduled Monday & Wednesday nights and Tuesday & Thursday mornings with the chance to take a water aerobics class instead on M, W, Th nights, which likely won’t happen, or would be simply more of a stretching type class as I have concluded I am just not burning enough to make those classes my workout. I am also entertaining the thought of setting the alarm early on Fridays to get in a quick 30-min cardio session before my on-call starts.

Cardio, it is such a broad term. I want to keep things interesting, and keep my body guessing about what is coming next. I really LOVE the elliptical, like REALLY love it. There are two types of elliptical machines, well three if you count the kind with no arms, in my gym. I used one of the older models this week when the gym was really busy and I could feel the different muscle groups being used. So I know I need to change that up a bit. So I know I can use one machine one day and the other at another point. There is also the recumbent bike, and my bicycle, and the treadmill. What I am thinking about is perhaps making a training schedule of what I should be doing on which days, however I am worried I will fall into the I don’t want to do this trap.

So for now I will just keep rolling with the punches, and keep letting myself do what I want at the gym since I can’t do it for as long as I want. It is kind of funny how that works… When you can’t do something you want to do it more. Today is Morning water aerobics (20-minutes of step aerobics in the water, plus some water barbel work etc) and tonight is cardio, I think elliptical but we shall see when the evening rolls around.

Please stay tuned to the blog this weekend… I am putting together something VERY special… I just need to get everything set up first. You wont want to miss this!

Give it a Tri!

Posted on August 16, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

I have come to realize that others can see things in me that i cannot yet see within myself. Be it strength or courage or even a girly side that I never knew was really there. This is where my dear friend Mariah comes in. Have you heard of Mariah? Did you know she is Unstoppable? I know I have written about her on my blog before, I first met her a few months ago at a PriorFatGirl event. She was sharing the story of how she found her way into becoming a triathlete. Mariah is an incredible woman. A Mother, a friend, a motivator. She is strong, confident, smart, funny, and AMAZING. A few months ago Mariah was all set to have an awesome active weekend doing her thing at a Tri called Trek. Just before she was set to leave for Trek a setback occurred. She was injured and unable to compete! You can go back and read her blog a bit and see some photos of the injury etc. It is quite a read, in fact her whole blog is quite a read!

She has had a long slow recovery from her injury, but she is a fighter. She also is an encourager! She can look at you, and see things in you that you can’t see in yourself. She has pulled me aside more than once now and told me I am destined for great things, and by great things she means Tri’s. That scares me! That is SO MUCH WORK! So to ease my fears, she invited me, and everyone else to come cheer at the next tri she did. That happened to be this past weekend! So Sunday our very own #Fat2FitPack member Mariah made her TRIumphant return to the triathlon circuit! I could not be prouder!

So off I went to Lake Nokomis in the early hours (okay, early for some, late for me I had finished work at 4:00am.) The sun was out, the grass was dewy under my sneakers as I made my way across the field and to the lake edge where the Tri would start.

I was pretty excited to look around as this Tri was put on by my gym… the YWCA of Minneapolis

I didn’t spend much time wandering around though, I wanted to find Mariah! We got to chat a bit before she had to get ready for her heat to start.

Mariah explained to me that women of all ages and shapes and sizes do the TRI, and she was right, I would later see a woman who was in her 60′s and I wouldn’t believe my eyes. How did I know she was in her 60′s? Because all participants get their age put on the back of their calves! YAY! An excuse to write on yourself!

Before we knew it Mariah’s heat was hitting the water and away they went swimming their hearts out! People were cheering, cowbells were ringing and the energy of the crowd was electric! It made me want to jump in the water for a swim for sure!!! We cheered as people came out of the water! We cheered for everyone, not just Mariah, and I laughed as I looked around and saw people I recognised from my gym, both volunteering and racing!

Once you swim, you are onto the ride of your life! All I can think of is how much my ass would hurt after a ride like that… but Mariah mounted up and away she rode!

When she got back, her husband, Paul (who I want to call Pauly for some reason, perhaps too many Pauly Shore movies) and her daughter Hannah and I, along with Corryn, Meredith, Ann and Jay nd I were SCREAMING her name and cheering for her. This was our chance to see in her what she sees in each of us. The determination the pure will the strength to be amazing. Mariah was truly being her Unstoppable self. She was in pain.
As we shouted and screamed to cheer her on, she made her way through the transition area and started the run.

As she got closer to us during the start of the 5k portion it seemed as though her endorphins were kicking in and her confidence started to grow a bit more. Maybe it was all the reminders we were yelling that she could do this!

We cheered for so many people, Ann really is amazing at motivating people during the race! I think perhaps it is because she has done so many races in her time. We moved toward the Finish Line, and started cheering from there. So many athletes it was amazing. The energy was just electric! Watching people complete the Tri was inspirational. Here comes Mariah approaching the finish line!

Our brave warrior finished the Tri! She fought through injury, and a shot recovery to finish this tri. She didn’t have enough time to train the way she wanted to for this tri, but you know what, She did it! Mariah you are Amazing! I followed her to the First Aid tent for some ice right after she crossed the finish line to get a comment.

Mariah do you have any comments for our readers out there in Blogland…
“It was so Amazing Kris, When everyone is cheering your name. You have to do this next year, you HAVE TO. I see a triathlete in you. You can SO do this.”

So this is the crew that everyone will be cheering on next year at the YWCA Tri? You never know Strange things can happen! Y-Tri? Y-Not?!

And remember kids… Mariah says it, because she believes in all of us…

(sign made by Ann)

My Saturday, One Step One Breath Summer Part 2

Posted on August 8, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

And we’re back. I have now logged more than 3 hours of sleep and I am feeling a bit better!

So I left off telling you all about all the wonderful things that Mary had to share with us. So lets pick up where we left off.

Lets think back to any geology or earth science lessons you know that as water from the ceiling of a cave dripping onto a rock will eventually make the rock change shape. As the water drips for more time, a hole can be worn into the rock. It is a process, that rock changes shape, it morphs into something it had never been before. Can you imagine anything harder than the rock? How can something as soft as water change that rock?

The answer lies in consistent change. This has been mentioned by every speaker I have listened to over the last few years. I stand by every single one of them, and absolutely believe them. The key to success is making small, sustainable, manageable changes. For example, one of the first things I started doing was making the choice to stop looking for the closest parking spot when I go to the store. This is easy right? Park a little further away and walk. Another example of what you could do is make the decision to cut out something from your diet. Give up that diet coke, or high fat salad dressing. Make the choice that during your 60-minute lunch break you are going to walk for 20 minutes and then take the other 40 to eat. The key is really to be consistent with these changes. Nothing happens overnight. You cannot expect to see changes over night. You didn’t put the weight on overnight.

Don’t get frustrated when you aren’t seeing those changes right away! You need to focus on the little things. Celebrate all the things you are doing, all the NSV’s (non-scale victories). You need to look at things like clothing fitting better, and having more energy. Before you know it you will be walking further without being winded, climb those stairs with less pain in your knees. The key is to keep making those little changes and stick with them.

Mary was also very fond of something we all seem to dig, which is cleaner eating. This means less processed foods. Processed foods have higher levels of chemicals and preservatives in them. Too much salt and sugar is not good for your body. I am not here to tell anyone what to eat or not eat. I am not the person to tell you what is right for your body, but I can tell you that when I eat any kind of fast food after having eaten so much whole, unprocessed food it makes me physically ill. So what is clean eating? I describe it best as being able to identify the parts of your food. Being able to trace the ingredients back to their original form. A piece of chicken should be the shape of the chicken. A McNuggett when you break it open, looks like a sponge. I can’t tell you what part of the animal that came from so I shouldn’t be eating that. If it came from the ground it is probably safe to eat too. Keep food simple, it doesn’t have to be fancy to taste good. All those additives are like food crack. We don’t need them.

Remember that you get to decide who you are and who you want to be. You have to visualise yourself being successful. See your successes in your mind. Picture yourself the way you want to be! Writing affirmations can help you feel stronger about yourself. I am ___XYZ___. The negative and neutral talk can stop you in your tracks, and even derail your successes. Saying I can’t is just as bad as I won’t. Along the lines of turn that frown upside down… turn those statements into I am I can and I will. Be certain in the things that you know, especially because you know them.

Mary showed us how to use some resistance band exercises and squats. There is a photo of me looking quite silly helping her out with a demo! I was happy to help out. If you know me, ever the people pleaser before, now knows how to say no, but jumps at the chance to do something fun and new! So Here is a website I found that shows how a few of the exercises.

Mary showed us how to properly do some squats with a chair. Along with some techniques if you need to actually touch down on the chair due to bad knees or anything like that. Mary spoke of the importance of weight training. This is an area that I really need to look into. I have stayed away from weight training due to my ehlers-danlos but I think it is time for a change. Body Weight exercises, such as push ups (like my push up challenge, which I am sad to admit I have fallen off the wagon on) can be done at home and will help build muscle. Muscle burns more calories. So cardio is great you go to the gym and workout, sweat for your 45 minute run and are done, but that person busting out the 45 minute weight session will continue to burn more calories than you after their workout is done.

However cardio isn’t a bad thing, you still need to workout! Apparently the ideal workout is about 45 minutes long and is repeated 5 or 6 days a week. She talked about the newer styles of cardio training that people are doing now. The most common seems to be HIIT. High Intensity Interval Training. Does that scare you? Is it the high intensity that scares you? Well are you doing c25k, then you are hiit training! The key to cardio training is to work out in the right heart rate zone. Immediately my hand shot up and I needed to know how to more specifically calculate the proper heart rate zone. We were each given this heart rate guide. I had been mostly following this chart, but training in Zone 4, which is not particularly a good zone to obtain any kind of fat burn. It also dawned on me that because my resting heart rate is so low that I may actually be peaking into Upper Zone 4, or Zone 5 where near no fat is being burnt and it is pure carbohydrate burn. What a waste, I mean I am sure that I need the exercise, but I want to see some results too. So I am waiting for Mary to send me some more specific information on how to calculate my heart rate zones.

Mary did an awesome job presenting to the group. I was so happy to finally meet her. I am hoping to develop a relationship with her, and possibly pursue a training relationship with her in the near future. She seemed to really have a great outlook on life and very similar goals. She is really amazing. I am hoping to get together with her for a walk or coffee sometime soon.

Next up was Jen, she talked about relationships.

Fathers Day 5k!

Posted on June 20, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

So Sunday was my Fathers Day 5k. In the last few years my Dad and I have gotten a lot closer. For this I am so very grateful! I never had a great relationship with my family. We had a lot of issues, my weight was the subject of constant ridicule. My dad grew up heavy, he knows how it hurts to be made fun of but still he kept on me about my weight. I now understand that what he wanted was the best life possible for me. I think the way he went about it was wrong, but hindsight is 20/20. He is so proud of the changes that I have made in my life to get healthy and gain control of what I want for myself. I wish that I did not have to let my life spiral so far out of control to get back into control, but there were so many health related issues that went unnoticed for so long that I think there was very little that would have stopped the train before it hit the wall.

It seems that the further I move away physically from my family the healthier I get. I think there is likely a high correlation between the two things. I have found out more about myself who I am, or who I think I am anyway. I am seeing that there are big pieces of my whole life that I can’t remember, this is not normal! As these pieces come back into place I am not sure why they were missing in the first place. I don’t know what they are protecting me from. I would like to find out. The people who are allowing me to find these pieces I know are so critical to my life.

So why a Fathers Day 5k? Well, no matter how good or bad the relationship I had with my father was he will always be my dad. I know that he has always wanted what was best for me, or rather what he thought was best for me. He never wanted presents for Fathers day, as I have been out on my own cards have been the order of the holiday. So now that I have the ability to at least walk/run a 5k I thought what better way to show my dad that the life he gave me is worth saving.

The 5k itself was incredible! The weather which had thunderstorms predicted the entire week up to the race turned at the last moment, being just overcast and in the upper 60′s low 70′s for the race. I chatted before the race with Gary Westlund a little bit, he is the founder and president of Charities Challenge. I also chatted with a few of the CCREW (these are the volunteers at the CC races). As soon as they saw the shirt and #PriorFatPack Bondiband they started asking if there were going to be more of us at the event this time.

I had people from the last race approach me with stories of being inspired by us. I had fathers and grandfathers bringing their wives and kids over to me after hearing the conversation that Gary and I had been having about my weight-loss and challenges. There were people asking where they could get info about the #PriorFatPack it was incredible. I truly felt like I was making my dad proud by being there in the moment talking to people about something I was passionate about.

Lookie! I got my second bib!

Race time came, we lined up and off we went. I ran a little walked a lot, ran some more walked a bunch. Discovered that the shorts I have been wearing are getting too big and are starting to fall off me… even though the scale disagrees with that assessment, the pants don’t lie! I also learned that my running shoes desperately need to be replaced, painful blisters now on both feet. I paced myself with a group of girl for the first mile or so. They had been just ahead of me from about 1/2 mile to the 1 1/3 mile area and then it happened. We had already started to be lapped by the runners, 12 mins in by my watch, and faster still because they started their heat ahead of when I crossed the line. I decided I was not going to be last. I felt the power surge through my body, and I started pushing for what I wanted. More than to finish, I wanted to finish strong. I wanted to finish ahead of the “just walkers”. I am not a speed demon but I was not going to let them get ahead of me again! I took a swig of water from the water bottle in my waist pack, and off I pushed!

RAWR!!!! EAT MY DUST!!!

I gained some ground escaping those girls. I looked back, didn’t see them. I pushed hard, through the pain in my ankle and the growing blisters on my feet (next time blister pads on both feet!) and kept going. The second lap seemed to go much faster than the first. I think it was likely because I wasn’t trying to keep up with the girls in front of me, it was because I was trying to stay ahead of them. I got to about mile 2.75 and was really ready to just call it quits. I was hot and sweaty. I looked back and could see the girls gaining on me. I looked ahead and saw people I recognized form the last race. I kept pushing, I was going to do this. My phone started lighting up with Tweets again telling me I was awesome! My playlist kicked into “Born This Way” the Glee version. I thought about my dad, and myself and my life, I let myself feel the words of the song. I knew that there was a reason why I was here, doing what I was doing and I saw the 3 mile marker. It was almost over. I rounded the corner, saw the timer and got goose bumps… I was going to make it under an hour! I approached the finish line, dodging two cute kids who decided a good place to play was right in the finish lane, and crossed over the line! 55:15 is what my Polar tells me. I wasn’t a blubbering mess this time! Gary said a little bit about me once again, explaining that I have lost a bunch of weight, and that I encourage others to not give up either. I am honored that he thinks so highly of me. It was a bit emotional for me when everyone was cheering at my weight-loss… I can’t believe how far I have come. I then cheered for the girls who I passed along the way! *RAWR!!!!!!*

I got a chance post-race to speak to a few individuals about my weight-loss and my blog. I am hopeful that those that reached out to me today find what it is that they are looking for. Today was such a success for me. I felt strong, the nerves were soothed pretty much as soon as I put my bib on and started talking about who I was. I guess I owe a thanks to my dad, because today I was there because of him, and I am finding huge things about myself in the process.

So that is what I do. I walk/run my way through the 5k as a present to my dad. A way to show him that the life he gave me is not going to go to waste. I have grabbed onto my one chance at this life and I am going for it! I will finally give him something to be proud of me for!

Thank You!

Posted on June 19, 2011 by krisgetshealthy

So I just have to say as I sit here… 3 hours from kick off of 5k number 2 packet pick up that my nerves are starting to kick in.

I have not trained at all really for this one… I have been a slacker since the last 5k, with everything in my life spinning around I just haven’t spent all that much time on the treadmill or the track. Is that what worries me? Nah, not really. Is the mysterious pain in my ankle of concern to me… well yeah. I stopped at the store and grabbed a small compression sleeve for my ankle in hopes that it will provide me with enough support to get through the run this morning.

There is much less pain than Friday, when at some points I couldn’t put any weight on my foot at all(!!). There are still twinges and sparks of pain that radiate, but as we say the show must go on. I will be carrying my cell phone with me on the 5k just incase something were to go wrong. It is a 2-lap event, so really if things go bad (worst case scenario) I can bail. I am not expecting to bail on this. I want it too bad.

So what is the deal with the nerves. Well, It’s a Fathers Day race… so it’s I am guessing going to be mostly guys… mostly fast runner types. I am slow… and female. There is always that I don’t want to be last feeling. I know there is nothing wrong with being last, because I am finishing, which is more than everyone who sits and watches does, and it is certainly more than anyone who slept in did! I am going to have a good time, I am going to run/walk to drop off my emotional baggage along the lake (more on this later). I am going because my dad didn’t want a Fathers Day present. He gave me life, it is now my turn to live it!

I am feeling so very blessed this morning, having now finished work, not having had a crazy busy day at work, it was tolerable. I received some praise for my excellent work in my job, which truly made me feel good. I often feel like I don’t do enough at my job, when I know I do far more than most in my position. I am also feeling so loved and cared for by my friends. I had Facebook messages of support starting days ago, getting me pumped up for the 5k! I also had emails, tweets, text messages, and even a special chat from people checking on me, telling me they were proud of me, supporting me. I don’t think anyone could possibly understand how much it truly means to me to have this many awesome people in my life. I wish I could give every single person a hug and find the words to say thank you because thank you isn’t enough. I don’t know at what point my life became so enriched with these wonderful people, but I am so grateful for it.

So I am sipping my electrolyte beverage, trying to head off the wonderful post-race cramps that I had last time, priming my iPod with some tunes (I even found a Michael Buble remix!) and looking through the photos from the last 5k. I have my Polar HRM laid out, my “Future PriorFatGirl” shirt, My #PriorFatPack BondiBand, sneakers, sharpie marker is ready to add speed lines to my tattoo!

I am getting excited to try this again… but the nerves are still there. You know what else is there… behind the tears that I am once again choking back (god I hate being a girl)… the sound of the #PriorFatPack cheering me on. The sound of my friends calling me wishing me a great race. Jen cheering with Iggy as I ran past at my first 5k… The RAWR that pushes me beyond my wildest dreams, oh and the thought that I have decided to stop for ice-cream on my way home from the race. I don’t know where I will go… but dammit I want ice-cream!

So… Thanks #PriorFatPack

Also… Don’t think I forgot….Happy Fathers Day to all the Dads out there! Especially mine, I love you Dad! This 5k is for you!

My Dad and I

Kris's Journal to Health

A Blog about a girl and her adventure to live a healthy life!

Tag Archives: 5k